Today marks a whole year since I left an existence of 23.71 years in Malaysia. Of dependence and pampering and being absolutely spoilt.
In these 12 months, I've learnt a lot. Things I'd always taken for granted because Someone Else was always there to do it for me. While I can un-jam photocopiers (most models) in record time or discuss the finer points of modern literature, I had no basic urban survival skills whatsoever. And really, I think it was quite typical of people of my generation.
Below are some of my modest achievements.
*drum roll*
Cooking
Take-outs and decent restaurants were always within a 5 minute drive away (I lived within the vicinity of 6 malls). Why bother? Well here on the Coast, food is almost always a disappointment and/or disturbingly processed. While my repertoire consists of few dishes, I'm proud to say the Fried Rice and Vegetable Soup are edible. Plus I now bake stuff I actually consume; granted it's from a mix. Baby steps.
Driving
A year ago, I didn't have a clue which pedal was for what (no, really). Now I happily maneuovre the car without killing/ maiming people and creatures or even scratching the paint (barring a few incidences earlier in the year). I do occasionally forget the seatbelt or headlights at night. And not to mention, after 2 failures I finally passed the driving test! Granted I had to pimp my instructor though (if anyone on the Coast needs someone patient, gentle and good-natured with an excellent track record, leave your email address and I'll send you her details).
And! I now know how to fill petrol on my own. No explosions so far. Hurray! Though I've only just found out my car can't do diesel. It's a good thing that Unleaded has a prettier logo. Phew.
Not having people to run to for everything
I'm not discrediting X - he's been an absolute angel and super patient with the hapless/ clueless - but he has his own life and can't be there for me for everything. I've learnt I have some wonderful friends who make up for their physical absence with lots of calls, messages and thoughtful words. Or some of the locals who make effort to contact me every other day because really, migrating to a foreign country all by your lonesome can be a really awful experience if left unchecked (literally). Of course, my mummy updates me on the latest gossip and reminds me to move away from the beach every week (Maternal Logic #45690: "Girl, the tsunami might hit Australia anytime! Make sure you stay far, far away from the beach." "Ma, I'm 200 metres from the beach on the Gold COAST." "Well, move further in!")too.
Talking to strangers
Whilst I sloughed myself of some rather nasty people I'd never really felt 100% comfortable, but remained friends with (I came to Queensland knowing less than 5 people), I'm slowly expanding my social circle. Being a room full of strangers still makes me nervous, but I've stopped hiding in the toilet with mini panic attacks and can manage a little socialising. Some of them even stay in touch! Long lunch sessions are looking to be a regular possibility.
A little less brandwhoring
Moving from a big city to a town with about 25% of KL's population inevitably meant a downgrading of material goods. I hated shopping here - where were TopShop, Zara and all the high street shops? Whilst I'm still looking for that elusive Chanel backpack on eBay every now and then (I ended up buying a vintage Moschino backpack in the end), I've stopped lamenting the fact that 90% of the labels in my wardrobe are completely unrecognizable.
Standing up for myself
Being the typical subservient, (relatively) tolerant Asian female, I'd put up with a lot of BS in my life. Now, I'll call a bluff when I see it and not be overwhelmed with guilt for hurting the other party's feelings/ not saving face. Compared to the outspoken folks here though, I'm probably still at the pretty mild end of the spectrum.
The gray area
I had such a good life before; I saw used to see things in black and white. People and situations were always good or bad. Good to be embraced; bad to be lopped out of my picturesque life and to never be heard from again. Yet here I've made some decisions which I was heavily judged upon and the saying of Let he who does not sin cast the first rock has never held truer.
When I first arrived, a lovely Belgian lady told me, "If you can stay here for two years without going back home, you'll be fine. The first two years are always the hardest."
There are days I question what I'm doing here, but I can honestly say most of the time I'm really glad to be here.
2 comments:
Well done, Jan! Apparently, I'm just one week behind you on a one year anniversary of moving to the UK.
Yea.. Things are quite true with the points you make. I realised it when I was living in Melbourne too. 90% of my wardrobe are unreconisable brands or can be categorised as surf brand rather than the high street luxury brand.
Cooking wise, yeah.. improvement over the years.. Takes time to trial an error. Mr. X would be the benefit of this, I see.. :P
Anyway.. well done and wish you all the best in the Kangaroo land!
thank you! hehehe. mr x has not gotten diarrhea for a while now. congrats on you moving to uk too! and the fact that you have a good job during these harsh times.
:)
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